Horrible title I know, but it's true. I can spot victims of potential crimes from a mile away:
The woman who leaves, not only her purse in the cart as she walks away, but her purse is wide open with her wallet ready to be grabbed.
The people who leave their car running, while they "run" into the store real quick (Note to those that do that with children....you should be arrested for endangerment, no questions. Go ahead and ask me what happened to the child that got left in a car at a gas station in St. Louis, go ahead, I still have nightmares.)
For some reason, I see these situations and turn them into possibilities for criminal actions. I've tried helping people by suggesting they at least close their purse or lock their doors, but then I get looks as though I'm the criminal. Whatever, to each their own stupidity, I guess.
I have discovered in my own home that I am a criminal. It was horrible at first, my moral angel sitting on my shoulder was telling me that it was wrong and I was going to get caught. The OCD devil thing on my other shoulder was listing the positives in the situation in alphabetical order. Sometimes my guilt, brought on by my moral angel, was just too much and I would create places for me to store these items. That was a year ago.
Now that I have almost finished through a year of first grade and preschool projects, my OCD devil has won outright. Now the two of us actually get a thrill from a successful plot.
What am I talking about? Those with kids, are familiar with the war we fight everyday, unless you are a pack rat or hoarder. This fight is against unnecessary things: broken crayons, broken toys, puzzles with pieces missing, random artwork (no, not every little piece of scrap paper they doodle on is special, sorry) or clothes they've grown out of. No, I don't throw it all away, I do give the clothes and usable toys to charities. On occasion, my kids will actually pick out a few things to donate....once a year, just before Christmas.
With toys and clothes I have a three step process. First they just sit on a shelf in their closets for a month or two. If they don't take them out, and either wear them or play with the toy in question, in then goes into the garage. If it makes it successfully into the garage and it's whereabouts aren't questioned, off it goes to charity. Clothes and toys are easy, I've got those down to a science.
Crayons, broken toys and classwork are an entirely different story. These involve a slight of hand that would make any pick pocket jealous. If you fail at this and the child sees you, you are in for crying and/or screaming, plus days of guilt.
We honestly have about 500 crayons, about 100 of them are broken into pieces. Yes, there are those that are crafty, that turn them into disks or whatever in their ovens. I honestly think these people just don't have the will power or the ability to throw the crayons away, and have found another outlet. Suck it up people!
As far as artwork and classwork, if my daughter writes a story or takes her time and draws a picture, I do save those. Same with my son, as far as pictures goes, he's not into writing just yet. However, if it is just regular, daily classwork, then yes, it gets tossed. When my son literally scribbles on paper and hands it to me, so he can scribble on the next paper, yes, those too get tossed.
The problem I have is, I think the pack rate gene skips a generation, because like my mother, my kids will go through the trash can to make sure I haven't thrown anything away.
I accidentally threw away one check when I was younger and my mom went nuts. I'm pretty sure when I visit, she still checks the trash, just in case. Fortunately my kids aren't at that level, but if they throw something away and happen to look down, I usually get the "why did you throw away this?" Ugh!
For those of you that need help with this slight of hand ability, the key is quantity. I will pile their non-important stuff in an area close to the trash can, this makes it seem as though I'm keeping every little thing. Then you wait until the high junk mail day comes, you know what I mean, that one day you get all sorts of random ads in the mail. Anyway, you go through it and make sure you pile those things on top of the non-important pile. Then you slide all that into the waste basket. The junk mail on top disguises what is underneath, and there is usually so much that the quantity isn't questioned. Either that, or you throw it away as you take the trash out to the bin, but you better be good at slight of hand, otherwise you are in for it.
Crayons and toys are trickier, because they usually make a thud in the trash can, no matter how full the stupid thing is. That small noise will bring the kids running as if there is a fire, be cautious. Piles by the non-important stuff seems to work too. The key here is quantity also, however the fewer the better in this case.
If you manage to think about these things when the kids are at school, then you have a huge safety net and your success rate should be really good. However, I can never remember until they get home, so I have to be sneaky.
In another post I can share how to eat snacks without your kids finding out. If you have a walk-in pantry, then you are golden. Otherwise, I will share how to get into the chocolate chips without crinkling the bag.
Good luck!
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